It’s not a new epidemic because I’m sure flight attendants are the ones who are really behind this. But it’s obviously something that needs to be detailed. Some of us have jobs that require us to visit different cities more frequently than others. And in that same breath, our domestic relationships may take a hit every now and then, right? Right.
Knowing this, we may not allow ourselves to fully indulge in a committed relationship due to the fact we don’t have access to our significant other as much as we’d like. This isn’t a permanent thing, unless you have commitment issues then you just need NOT to be in any kind of relationship, just something to suit your domestic needs for the time being.
Well, to the credit of a friend of mine will remain nameless, i thought up some rules and guidelines for #LocationShips.Yes you read correctly, #Locationships. Relationships based on your frequently visited locations.
Now I know what you’re probably thinking: “Isn’t that just a long distant Friends With Benefits?” Or “Isn’t that your out of town jump?” No, because when it comes to “Friends With Benefits” you’re pretty much on a trial and error run with said person to see if you can tolerate them or not.
No to “jump” because that’s pretty much your basic booty call and if you can’t find a booty call within your OWN city, then there are some things you need to alter in your life lol. And just so we’re clear? #Locationships can not happen in a city you and your partner live in; that’s called a relationship!
Again, this is mainly to people who travel more than the average strictly due to their profession. If you’re traveling to the same city to see this person? You my friend are in a committed long distant relationship. Don’t get me wrong because there’s nothing bad about that, but that’s not what THIS is.
When it comes to your #Locationships, there are many key factors to keep in mind
Hanky Panky Is NOT Mandatory: Sex does NOT have to be had for this to be deemed a #LocationShip. 9 times out of 10, however, you and said person have established some kind of intimate connection to where you you’ll want to smother each other upon arrival. But that doesn’t mean sex. The infatuation levels may be so high, you just want to hold hands and play fight with each other all damn day/weekend. But if you wanna pounce and blow each others brains out? This is fine. Jesus didn’t turn water into Wine for you not to play leap frog during your #LocationShip. Just be safe.
No Parents, No Kids: In a #Locationship, you are not to meet ANY of your partners family members. You are also not to meet their kids IF they in fact have any. You are in a #LocationShip to be a selfish S.O.B. with that person for a short amount of time, not build a bond with their blood relatives. Once you cross that line? You have entered forbidden commitment territory.
The Double Up: You can have more than one #Locationship. Understand you are not the only fish in the sea. For instance, if BOTH of you travel frequently, there’s a chance this could be happening in another part of the country. Communication is extremely vital in these situations. Hell, the reason for BEING in a #Locationship is the fact you can’t commit and you travel more than average. As LONG as the players on both sides understand this? Fair game.
Don’t Hit Send: This is the Social Media/Texting part of the show. You are to NOT send your #Locationship partner subtweets, drunk texts and/or “Who the fuck is that” messages. Remember, when you are not in front of this person? All bets are off. They can do as they please. In addition, I’m almost positive one if not both of you is being harassed/nagged by someone in your own city, it’s not going to be cool if you’re doing to your #LocationShip parner as well. That’s just not fun.
Holiday Season: The ONLY way you are allowed to celebrate ANY holiday with your #Locationship partner is if you just HAPPEN to be in that city during that specific time. You are NOT to make advanced plans with this person. No. I said HELL FUCKING NO. You wanna live this #Locationship life? Well then somethings you’re going to have to sacrifice. Oh and let me not forget, you are DEFINITELY not allowed to SEND gifts to that person for the holidays OR birthdays. It’s not that you’re being cheap, mean or an asshole, but once expectations are thrown into the mix? Things can get really tricky. Keep it simple with phone calls and texts on the birthdays and holidays.
Alright folks, that’s pretty much all I got for right now in regards to this subject. Don’t look down on #Locationships because its a very real thing. And as long as you’re communicating and being SAFE? This shouldn’t be something any of you frown on. You may not like it, but you DAMN sure gone respect it lol.
Let me first ask you this: Are you a flirt? Oh you’re not? This might be for you. Oh, you are? This is definitely for you. Oh, you HATE flirts? Turn the page because this might piss you off.
Flirting while in a relationship is frowned upon, but it’s NOT cheating. And this isn’t really based for the folks who are in relationships, but you can apply some of these methods to that structure to add a little fire to a dying candle if you want. I’m a huge flirt, but I’m sure you guys knew that already. It’s a sport in which we’re ALL active in. ALL of us. Some are just more blatant about it than others. And not that having it or not having it on front street is wrong, but some people are just private and/or shy about their flirting habits.
Flirting takes place EVERYWHERE: Twitter, work, church, Instagram, the club, Shake Shack, public transportation, the gym…hell, anywhere you can exchange communication in a clear and distinct manner that ass can flirt. It’s a matter of picking the best environment so you can say the right things. And it’s also about the timing, but that’s a lil deeper than I’d like to get right now.
When you flirt, it’s not an excuse to be a horn dog unless that’s the vibe you and your intended target established from jump. To many, flirting satisfies that instant gratification button, domestically. Temporary butterflies and frequent bottom lip bites throughout the day. Again, I need to stress the importance of how some folks flirt for the sport because it’s just a FUN thing to do with the opposite sex. Not EVERY chance you get at flirting is an opportunity to get someone in the sack. I’ve flirted with a shitload of girls but don’t express the “we should hook up” gesture that they’re probably assuming is coming at any second.
Think of flirting as practice for when something you WANT comes trotting along. These random flirts are pretty much trial and error experiments to see what works and what doesn’t.
MY #1 rule in flirting is to make her laugh. But my ass is silly off rip so that doesn’t take much effort. Paying attention to specific details about your intended target is so crucial because it keeps things interesting and not stagnant. Now I’m not saying go to Wkiipedia and dig up the plot to episode 6 season 3 of her favorite show so you can throw references in her timeline (that’s for the one you’re aiming to wife). However, a glance at her timeline and/or Instagram feed from a couple hours prior won’t hurt.
Another thing, don’t use the same flirting techniques with every lady you flirt with. Women aren’t DUMB (they do dumb shit but they’re not dumb). Women can easily tell when you’ve said something similar to another girl. Don’t ask me HOW I know that, but yeah…..they can lol.
Here’s where it gets tricky with the flirting, though. If you’re going to flirt with more than one target? You can NOT….and I fucking REPEAT, can NOT get mad, irritated, jealous or possessive when he/she does the same thing. Again, this is a sport for folks with thick skin. In your head? You can do whatever you please, but that ass better not get mad when you just sent him/her a bevy of smiley faces an hour ago lol.
IF you feel yourself drifiting into feelings with one of your intended targets? Activity with other targets should be cut to a minimum. You can refer to this post “Oh, So Now It’s Getting Serious?” for a bit of a better understanding. It might be a bit of a jump because we’re simply talking about flirting right now, but there are a couple reference points in there that might help. Both of you know when it’s getting to be more than just FLIRTING so flirt responsibly.
If you choose to flirt during night hours while drinking? Just be prepared to clean up that mess in the AM. Usually that shit turns into sexting. 90 percent of the time it does. Some folks are bold during the day, but when that sun goes down…..the mouth gets looser and the mental gets dirtier.
Finally, KNOW WHEN TO STOP FLIRTING. This could be one of if not the most important rule to this sport. I don’t know if its folks pride that gets the best of them or some people are that BLIND. But if you’re liking their pics and not getting yours liked back? Throw in the towel. If you’re ALWAYS DM’ing them and getting no love? Throw in the towel.
If they refuses to entertain your consistent attempts of conversation at the water cooler in your office? Throw in the towel. You have to read these situations, man. And quickly. And if that’s the case, DON’T TURN BITTER. Don’t subtweet. Don’t bad mouth. Just keep it pushing. It’s NOT the end of world because they don’t return the flirt. It’s ooooooooo k lol
I think you guys are getting the drift in regards to flirting. Some of this stuff might work, some might not work. But WHATEVER you do with this flirting shit, make sure you have FUN with it. Cool? Happy Flirting you heathens!
*Disclaimer* I’m NOT writing this post because Cuffing Season is upon us. In FACT, I don’t believe in that garbage to begin with, but that’s for another day/post.
Ohhhhhh, so you like him or her do we? Having conversations about this person with your inner circle more than you’d like? Your disdain for girls/guys flirting with him/her via Twitter and Instagram is slowly starting to leak through your pours? He/She is the first one you invite out INSTEAD of your comrades? Uh oh, someone has a serious case of the “Likes.” And there’s NOTHING wrong with that….AT ALL.
So what are you going to do about it? Oh? You’re looking to ME to tell you? No no no…that’s not going to happen. BUT, here are some things you should look out for and/or consider when you start to enter the “serious step” with your crush. Though it’s not a full blown relationship just yet, you’re tracing along the lines of those characteristics. With that said, you’re going to start having to tap the chins of each “boyfriend/girlfriend” trait.
Now if this is STILL just a crush? Stop here and do NOT go any further….I’m not trying to scare your ass off back into some random girl/guys DMs because you’re not prepared to lose your “freedom.” But, if this has EVOLVED passed the crush stage here’s what you might want to consider.
The Parent Talk: One thing WE all want within this domestic domain is for our parents to approve who we like/love, right? I know I do. So with you and them entering the stages of a flourishing relationship, it’s important that you brush over the issue of that you’re seeing someone. Does that mean you introduce them to Mama and Daddy? No the fuck it does not. However, when you guys are chilling and your mom or dad happen to call? Mention that you are with said partner and even give them the phone so they can start to gain some familiarity. An ice breaker if you will. Let them feel your parents out and let your parents feel him/her out. Remember, suggestion…NOT A MUST.
The Other “Friends”: We ALLLLLLL have those other “friends” that we’ve hooked up with that we happen to run into at events, randomly in the city or wherever else there’s liquor and food. Be very mindful of that with him/her. Guys AND girls know this very well: if you’ve fucked someone or we’re “dealing” with someone and you didn’t end it, it’s very easy for it to be spotted…ESPECIALLY if your poker face sucks. If you’re NOT ready to be in that HOT seat, I seriously suggest you re-think how “serious” this is getting.
Bringing Them Around Your Inner Circle: It’s imperative that you want specific friends of yours to like him/her. You have a core group of people that you KNOW you’re always around and/or will call when some shit goes down. If this is getting serious, let it show. He/she KNOWS or is STARTING to know who you value in your life on a day to day basis..let her in on that. I’m not saying every time yall hang out, he/she HAS to tag along, but when and if she does MAKE IT KNOWN that he/she is your interest. PDA, compliments, joking, play fighting. If you’re getting serious, let it be known. The introduction doesn’t yet have to be “Oh this is my GF/BF” or “This is my baby”, your friends will know what’s what when you start bringing him/her around consistently AND in different settings.
PDA: This kind of spills over from the last tip, show that motherfucking PDA. Listen, I know some of you are sitting their…cringing at the thought of showing public displays of affection but let me tell you THIS: the right person can bring ANYTHING out of you..and I’m talking ANYTHING. From NASTY ass sexting to cute as cuddling at the bar with EVERYONE watching. It just takes that right person and the right comfort level. If this is getting serious, that comfort level is boiling. Most importantly, don’t force it. Half the time, people don’t want to show the affection in fear of what? Yep, you guessed it…REJECTION. Make him/her it’s ok to fall because you’ll easily catch them. ;)
Observe: By now, you know what pisses them off, what makes them happy, what makes them horny, what makes them hungry lol. Men, I’m talking to you on this one. You and her are coming to the point where you’re learning each other very well, right? She is now beginning to EXPECT that ass to pay attention to key things. If you’re not willing to pay attention to those details yet? Pull back. 9 times out 10 she’s putting a shitload of energy into your ass. But she’s waiting for you to PROVE why you wanna be serious with her lol. Know that list above. KNOW IT MOTHERFUCKERS! Ladies, learn his favorite NBA/NFL team’s schedule. Pay attention to his shit talking when it comes to these sports rivalries. I mean know his favorite foods, what makes him laugh and all that goodness, but if you learn those schedules and rivalries for him? Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit lol.
Ight ladies and gents, those are just some tips and suggestions I felt like sharing with you guys. Remember, if you’re not serious with her just yet? This isn’t for you. If it’s still a crush, keep CLEAR of this motherfucker lol. Hopefully this helped in your quest for domestic bliss.